Inside Me

When I was younger, I spent a lot of time reading and writing poetry.  In moments of isolation and loneliness, I found solace in putting pen to paper.  Although most of my poems were childish and allowed me to pine about lost loves, I have held onto one particular poem for many, many years.  I titled it "Inside Me".  Each time I read it, I'm gently reminded that even though I did not understand the words I was writing at that time, innately, I grasped the concept of self reliance and spirituality.  It wasn't until many years later that I fully understood what the words actually meant.  So often, we search for things "out there" to fill voids in our life; however, you will never find true happiness out there until you discover it "inside" first.

"INSIDE ME"

Sitting here, thinking for a while,
My mind seems to travel for miles
Back to a somewhere long ago,
The time, the place I do not know.
Rain falling, wind blowing, lightening bolts
Are the things a remember the most.
A puzzle, a maze, a crazy face,
Darkness so deep in this lonely place.
I try to run, I try to hide.
To the top, to the bottom,
Inside, outside.
Searching for something stable and strong.
Finally, a hand, but I’m still alone.
This hand seems familiar , like I almost know it.
It’s so very dark, so this hand, I hold it.
Then out of this darkness, suddenly a light.
Almost blinding, it’s so beautiful and bright.
I move toward it slowly, closer so that I may see.
If I’m all alone, then whose hand could this be?
With the help of the light, I hold on with my life,
And before my eyes, as strange as it seems,
The hand I’ve been holding belongs to me.
Now, I’m back to the place I was before,
But I understand so much more.
The things I want, and the things I need,
I know I can find them
Right INSIDE me.

The beautiful pictures I've included in this post are by digital mixed media artist Howard David Johnson. His full gallery can be viewed at www.howarddavidjohnson.com